Lucian's Dialogues Volume 3: The Dialogues of the Dead

Lucian of Samosata

Play

Length

2 h 43 min

Chapters

30

Language

English

Genre

Classics (Greek & Latin Antiquity), Dramatic Readings, Satire

First published

1913

Chapters

1. 1 Dialogue I. Diogenes commissions Polydeukes, about to return to the upper world, to inform Menippus of the actual condition of things in the land of shades, and to deliver admonitory messages to various sorts of men-the rich, the powerful, the proud; and, finally, to the poor, whom, when they complain of their lot on Earth, he is to console by representing the complete equality which prevails in the regions of the dead.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 5:37
2. 2 Dialogue II. Eroesus, Midas, and Sardanapalus complain to Pluto of Menippus that he derides them for their lamentations over the loss of the power, wealth, and luxury which belonged to them on Earth. - Menippus, in spite of Pluto's remonstrances, persists in his ridicule.Read by TriciaG and 4 others 4:06
3. 3 Dialogue III. Menippus ridicules the Oracles of Trophonius and Amphilochus.Read by Alan Mapstone and 2 others 3:02
4. 4 Dialogue IV. Hermes demands from Charon arrears of payment due to him for his services on the styx. Charon excuses himself on the plea of bad times; no great war or famine, as it happened, ravaging the Earth at that moment. Hermes moralises on the causes of death, different from those of old, which despatch men in crowds to Hades.Read by Algy Pug and 1 other 3:52
5. 5 Dialogue V. Pluto directs Hermes to bring him the fortune and legacy-hunters and flatterers of a certain rich man, and to suffer the latter to outlive his fawning satellites.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 4:30
6. 6 Dialogue VI. Terpsion, a legacy-hunter, accuses Pluto and the Fates in that, although only thrity years of age, they had caused hime to predecease the object of his theder regards, the millionaire nonagenarian, Thukritus. Pluto convinces Terpsion of the injustice of his accusation; and the legacy-hunter consoles himself in the prospect of being soon joined in Hades by his late rivals on Earth.Read by Alan Mapstone and 1 other 6:51
7. 7 Dialogue VII. Zenophantes and Kallidemides, two parasites, bewail one to the other their fates, in having been in the midst of their scheming unexpectedly mismissed to Hades. Killidemides, in particular, recounts the pleasant manner in which he brought about his own death.Read by Alan Mapstone and 1 other 3:23
8. 8 Dialogue VIII. Knemon, a legacy-hunter, laments to his neighbour Damnippus, that, whereas he had publicly, in his will, bequeathed all his wealth to the millionaire Hermolaus, in the expectation that the latter would reciprocate the benefit, he, the speculating testator, by his sudden death, had been frustrated of all his hopes, and besides, had left his family destitute.Read by Alan Mapstone and 1 other 2:50
9. 9 Dialogue IX. Polystratus, a centenarian plutocrat, upon arriving in hades, narrates to his friend Simylus how, by reason of his great wealth, he had enjoyed the adulation of the world and an abundance of gifts from speculating flatterers, and how he had disappointed them all by his will.Read by TriciaG and 1 other 6:00
10. 10 Dialogue X. An alarming number of ghosts crowd to the styx. Charon, fearing fro his boat, directs Hermes to see that they were entirely stripped of their various insignia of power, rank, wealth, and the weighty load of vices, before they are admitted on board. Menippus, who is one of the passengers, avails himself of the opportunity for ridiculing and railing at the bewailing ghosts.Read by TriciaG and 10 others 15:19
11. 11 Dialogue XI. Krates and Diogenes, meeting in Hades, indulge their satire on the subject of the fates of two millionaire merchants (cousins) who had been constantly plotting, in the usual manner, each for the other's legacy, and who had both perished on the same day by shipwreck. The two eminent cynics congratulate themselves on the recollection of the very different character of their own objects in life.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 5:50
12. 12 Dialogue XII. Alexander of Macedon and Hannibal, quarrelling for precedence, submit the arbitrament of their cause to Minos. Each recounts his exploits. Scipio, the conqueror of Carthage, intervenes, and pronounces in favour of Alexander, claiming the second place for himself, and assigning the third place to Hannibal.Read by Larry Wilson and 3 others 10:15
13. 13 Dialogue XIII. Diogenes jeers at Alexander of Macedon for his late pretensions to divinity, at the same time satirizing the servile attitude of the conquered Greek states towards him. He proceeds to remind the arrogant Conqueror of all this vain power and glory, and casts large part of the blame on Alexander's preceptor Aristotle, for flattering and fostering the pride and ambition of his pupil. Diogenes, finally, recommends the dead Potentate to drink the waters of the river Lethe.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 6:39
14. 14 Dialogue XIV. Philip, King of Macedon, ridicules his son Alexander's absurd arrogance in claiming to the the son of Ammon, and calls in question the greatness of his military achievements. Alexander defends himself.Read by Mike Manolakes and 1 other 6:49
15. 15 Dialogue XV. Antilochus, the son of Nestor (one of the Greek heroes who fell during the siege of Ilium), remonstrates whith his friend Achilleus for having given utterance to the words put into his mouth by the poet of the Odyssey-that he would rather be a slave on Earth than King in Hades-shows hime the uselessness of regrets in the under-world, and, at the same time, attempts to console him with the reflection that he is far from being alone in his fate. Achilleus takes the admonition of his friend in good part, but refuses to be comforted.Read by Alan Mapstone and 1 other 5:18
16. 16 Dialogue XVI. Diogenes, the cynic, expresses his astonishment to Herakles at seeing the son of Zeus in Hades, like the rest. That hero pretends that his actual self is in Heaven, while it is his eidolon, or phantom, which is among the dead.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 6:45
17. 17 Dialogue XVII. Menippus derides the fable and fate of Tantalus.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 3:24
18. 18 Dialogue XVIII. Menippus desires Hermes to point out to him the beautiful women and handsome men celebrated by the poets. Hermes showes him the ghosts of the most famous of them, and, in particular, that of Helene. Menippus cynicaly expresses his astonishment that a bare skull should have caused a great war, and the deaths of so many thousands.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 3:04
19. 19 Dialogue XIX. Protesilaus, one of the victims of the Trojan War, seeks to avenge himself by an assult on Helene - Aeakus, gatekeeper and one of the high court of justice in Hades, reminds him that it is Menelaus, the Commander-in-Chief of the Achaean Army against Ilium, who is the proper object of his vengeance. Menelaus shifts the responsibility to the shoulders of Paris. Paris lays the blame upon Eros. Aeakus decides that Protesilaus has only himslef to blame for preferring military glory to a young and beautiful wife; but concedes to Protesilaus that the blame, in the last resort, lies with the Fates.Read by ToddHW and 3 others 4:04
20. 20 Dialogue XX. Aeakus, at the especial request of Menippus, introduces him to the ghosts of the most celebrated potentates of antiquity, when the cynic avails himself of this opportunity for ridicule and derision. Menippus is next introduced to the most famous philosophers, whom he treats with not much greater consideration. The dialogue concludes with the interview with Sokrates, whoes foibles, real or pretended, are made the subject of satire.Read by ToddHW and 4 others 7:54
21. 21 Dialogue XXI. Menippus inquires of Kerberus, the canine guardian of the enterance to Hades, as to the demenour of Sokrates upon his first arrival there.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 2:46
22. 22 Dialogue XXII. Charon demands from Menippus his accustomed fee. Upon the absolute refusal of the cynic to pay, a lively altercation ensues.Read by Algy Pug and 2 others 3:38
23. 23 Dialogue XXIII. Protesilaus, an Achaean hero, who had fallen before Ilium, supplicates Pluto to permit him to return to life, for a day, to visit his wife Laodameia, and adduces as precedents the examples of Orpheus and Alkestis. At the intercession of Persephone, Pluto at length grants the favour.Read by Alan Mapstone and 2 others 4:58
24. 24 Dialogue XXIV. Diogenes demands of Mausolus, the Karian Satrap, the reason of his arrogance and pride, and ridicules the vanity of his grandeur and power on Earth, and, in particular, the uselessness to him of his magnificent tomb at Halikarnassus. He concludes his diatribe with contrasting his own complete ignorance and indifference in regaud even to the manner, or place, of his own sepulture.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 5:09
25. 25 Dialogue XXV. Nireus and Thersites, disputing which of them was the more distinguished by good looks, appeeal to Menippus. Menippus, disregarding the authority of Homer, pronounces the ι΄σοκα΄λλος as well as the ι΄σοτι΄μι΄α in Hades, to be as complete as it in unalterable.Read by Alan Mapstone and 2 others 3:27
26. 26 Dialogue XXVI. Cheiron imparts to Menippus his reason for preferring Hades to Heaven and immortality.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 3:29
27. 27 Dialogue XXVII. The philosophers Diogenes, Antisthenes, and Krates resolve to make for the entrance to Orcus, to observe the quality of conduct of the new arrivals. On the way they entertain themselves with recounting their several experiences of the behaviour of their travelling companions to Hades. Upon their arrival at their destination, Diogenes interrogates a poor man as to the cause of his lamentation.Read by ToddHW and 3 others 11:17
28. 28 Dialogues XXVIII. Menippus ridicules the story of the prophet Teiresias as found in the poets and theologiests, and, in particular, his metamorphosis into a woman.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 4:42
29. 29 Dialogue XXIX. Agamemnon inquires of (Telamonian) Aias the reason of his late cool reception of Odysseus, when he came down to learn the future from Teiresias. Aias justifies his hostile feeling by alleging the conduct of Odysseus to him, in the matter of the competition for the arms of Achilleus.Read by ToddHW and 1 other 3:42
30. 30 Dialogue XXX. Sostratus, for his crimes, about to be consigned by Minos to the tortures of Tartarus, protests against the injustice of his sentence; since, upon the admissions of his judge himself, he had been a mere instrument in the hands of fate. Minos, moved by the plausibility of his plea, reprives him.Read by Larry Wilson and 1 other 4:48

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